Stardate: 3/20/2008 Not so Newsworthy News

Here are some random notes on daily life here:

• They believe that if you sit on something cold, like a cement wall or park bench, that your ovaries or balls will freeze. You never see people sitting on cold surfaces. You also never see people sit on the floor. They look at you weird if you do.
• In most public areas, where we'd have grass, it's just dirt. I don't have any idea why.
• Men always carry heavy bags and let females go first through doors. I love this! Men come to Ukraine to marry the Ukrainian beauties, and they certainly are gorgeous. FYI: Young women, I think that the Ukrainian men are the real prize...
  
• Sometimes the teachers in my department just skip classes without notice.
• They have Avon products here, but only 1 or 2 items are the same.
  
• We have to leave the country or register with the police as "resident aliens" (or some such thing) before 90 days are up. If not, we have to pay a $150.00 fine. We had to pay it at Christmas, because we got the dates wrong. We reentered Ukraine on Jan 25th, so we have to register or leave/reenter before April 25th. We found out that if you do register with the police, it's a LONG process involving getting insurance here (that does nothing), getting forms from different departments in different parts of the city, getting health exams, and getting things notarized in addition to paying $170.00. What? OR you can leave the country for an hour and then come back in. If you want to go across the border to Russia, you must get a Russian visa in advance. To get a Russian visa, you must apply at the Consulate, have an invitation letter from some one (or a hotel, but then you need a reservation), and you have to pay $200.00. OR you can leave by crossing the country to Poland, Slovakia, Moldova, or Romania, which cost nothing to enter if you are an American. The trains cost some, but more importantly you are spending 5 days traveling! If you ask me, it's bureaucratic insanity...or as an esteemed colleague called it Rada graft.
• In Kharkiv, Ukraine, not only can you not get English newspapers, you cannot get Ukrainian language news. It's all Russian language in these parts.
• When they vote here, they only get to vote for a party (except for the presidency, I think). The party does not provide a slate of candidates prior to the election. Once the party wins some seats, then the party leader chooses who will fill them. People don't elect any midlevel politicians or judges, they only elect the mayor. Therefore, there is no public accountability for actions in terms of political or judicial jobs. For example, if you wanted to complain about some issue, the person responsible could care less if you have a problem. They are not the slightest bit interested in public opinion. My students had never even heard of an opinion poll.
  
• At McDonalds, you can tell them which toy you want for the Happy Meal. If you don't tell them, they will ask. Also, condiments are obligatory for chicken nuggets and they charge for them. They don't have nuts on their sundaes.
  
• If you are admitted to a hospital, it's like 1800's here in terms of hospital care. You must bring your own linens and provide your own food. Family members play a key role in doing these things as there is no way to pay for this service. Imagine the stress in addition to having a loved family member hospitalized.
• The tax system is obscure and incomprehensible to everyone, including property owners. We know that there is no sales tax. There may be a property tax. There is an income tax, but it is a flat rate for everyone rich and poor. Most people don't know how the rate is calculated. The taxes are just taken out of their pay checks.
• Property is an issue due to the transition from the USSR. For example, some people own land, a flat, or a dacha, but in some places the land, apartments or houses are still gov't owned. There is a lot of inconsistency in property ownership.
• Businesses go out of business here faster than they do in EC, and I'd say it was fast in EC. There have been so many turn overs in businesses that we frequent that we cannot even keep up with the names.
  
• You don't need a prescription for most drugs at the pharmacy. You can get just about anything you want, even heavily monitored drugs in the US, like steroids, etc are easily obtained. The only stuff you cannot get without a prescription are class 1 barbiturates and amphetamines (like heroine and cocaine).
• On military officers uniforms, rank is distinguished by the size and number of the stars on their epaulettes. Therefore, the difference between a lieutenant and a general is determined by 3 different size stars. Everyone looks like a general around here.
  
• Police actually come quickly if they are called, like within 20-30 minutes. We've waited for up to 3 hours for police in Cinti!
• They don't use celery stalks like we do. They use the leaves, but they are not used nearly as often as we use celery in the US. We have only found celery stalks here once. A & V had never seen them before.
• Maddy is completely toilet trained!
• Many, many stray dogs. It's so sad. Again, where's Bob Barker when you need him? I heard he retired. :-( Hey, Bob, visit Ukraine, okay?
  
• Our mini-tv is dead to the world. It has put tons of pressure on our use of the computer since now that is our family television, too.
• Cable here only has 2 English channels. On those channels, programming in English only occurs 30% of the time.
  
• It is extremely difficult for Ukrainians to get visas to go to other countries. They have to go through a lot of rigmarole to get them including visiting Kyiv at least once. The visas also cost a lot. Up to $200 in some cases.
• Ukrainians vacation in Turkey and Egypt. The Crimea, the southern part of Ukraine, was the traditional location for vacations. But the costs are just as high if not higher to go there and the service is abysmal!
  
• In terms of movies, Ukrainians only get the huge blockbusters from the US. They don't get the art house or off-the-beaten-track movies. So, for example, my students have never heard of (just paging through our DVDs we brought from the US): Bewitched, O Brother, Where Art Thou, This is Spinal Tap, When Harry Met Sally, A Christmas Story, Hitch, Road Trip, Young Frankenstein, The Outlaw Josey Wales, An Inconvenient Truth, Bowling for Columbine, Excalibur, Wedding Crashers, Raising Arizona, Forest Gump, Animal House, Groundhog Day, There's Something About Mary, Bedazzled, Tommy Boy, Shallow Hal, Shakespeare in Love, Pleasantville, etc. Let alone classics, like Casablanca or the Philadelphia Story. They all have heard of South Park.
• The door locks on the interior doors at the Polytechnic are nicknamed "chastity belts." :-) This one's for you, Sasha!
• Students who are on gov't scholarships sometimes don't receive them or they receive them very late.
• Those who smell of body odor, don't smell because they don't bathe. Actually, I've realized they smell of b.o., because they don't wash their clothes as often. They wear them many, many times even though they smell. They bathe and then put on dirty clothes. It's due to the fact that many don't have access to laundry facilities or that it is too time consuming to wash them by hand. Most Ukrainians wash their clothes by hand regularly.
  
• There is a dearth of processed foods, which is good I know. But they don't have easy mac and cheese! You cannot find mac 'n cheese here! What are you supposed to do with a 3 year old without mac 'n cheese? ;-) Forget p, b & j= they don't have peanut butter, of course. We have, however, recently found processed cheese slices. Maddy calls them "blue cheese" because of the blue packaging. We've been making a lot of grilled cheese.